|
|
22/07/06 - 28/07/06 - AMERICA, F**K YEAH!!!
Arriving at the airport in Fiji I was thinking "Ah cool, I'm going to America!" Since this part of my journey had only recently been added on, I was really excited about it. But then I started queuing for my flight and there was a group of American teenage (white) kids next to me, who were trying to MC about their time in Fiji ("We stayed in a tent, we didn't pay any rent"). Then I thought, "Oh God. I'm going to America".
My journey to the States meant I got to travel back in time. I took off from Fiji at 10pm on Saturday 22nd July. I had a 10 hour flight to LA, 5 hours at LAX, then a 2 hour flight to Denver, Colorado. I arrived at 9:38pm on Saturday 22nd July - 22 minutes before I took off from Fiji. I got a shuttle to the hotel and checked into my room. Mum showed up a few hours after that and she was more than happy to see me again.
On our first day we went to Estes Park on the edge of the Rockies. We did a short walk up a peak which gave us amazing views, but was bloody hard work considering how jet lagged us both were.
The next day we had a long drive up to Keystone in South Dakota. On the way we stopped at a Mammoth Site. Now this wasn't your usual American attraction in the middle of nowhere; where you see 'Mammoth Site' advertised for 100s of miles, then you get there and it's just a cardboard cut-out of a mammoth. This site actually had the real remains of mammoths. 24,000 years ago it was a sink hole that loads of mammoths got stuck in. 30 years ago builders came across the remains when they started bulldozing to make houses. To date they've found the remains of 55 different mammoths, and expect to find at least 100 more.
It was a good job this site wasn't in the Mid West or Deep South, otherwise it would have been very controversial for them to talk so openly about evolution. I could imagine them having a Fundamentalist Christian version of the tour where they said "Since God created the Earth only 10,000 years ago, these mammoth remains were clearly put here as a test of our faith. But let's take a look at them anyway because they sure look neat!"
On Wednesday we drove around the surrounding areas in South Dakota. This included visiting the old mining town of Deadwood that looked just like a Hollywood set at Universal Studios, except for one major difference - it's real. Back in the day, there was a guy here called "Wild Bill" who was the most rootinest, tootinest, gun slinger in the ollllllllllld West. Well, until he got shot. Anyway, the whole town's tourism is based on him because he got shot in the back whilst playing cards here.
On Thursday we headed to Badland's National Park. On the way we stopped at the Minuteman Missile site. This site featured one of the still intact nuclear missiles in its launch site from the Cold War. The missile was designed so that at any time, America could blow the crap out of Russia within half an hour. We popped in the visitor centre, and one of the Park Rangers came up to us saying, "Well hi, how can I help you?"
"Yeah, we just wanted to see what there is to do here," we replied.
"Well, I may say you've come to one of the greatest historical sites in all of America. The tour we have here is just fantastic. You go in small groups of 12 and you get to see round the launch site, which is just like it was during the Cold War. We tell you about the history of the site, and within half an hour you'll even know how to launch the missile yourself! You'll even get to see the nuclear missile! It simply is an amazing tour!"
"Oh right, so what time do the tours begin?"
"Oh they're all fully booked."
I had to try so hard not to laugh! It was so stupid. It's kind of like going on TV to promote your new film, then being asked when it's out and saying "Oh it's not actually being released." What an idiot.
Anyway, we spent the day driving round Badland's National Park which was spectacular. The next day we went to Mt Rushmore. I always worried that when I finally saw Mt Rushmore it wouldn't look anywhere near as big as it's made out to be in all the films and photos I'd seen of it. I worried I would get there and it would just be a carving on a small rock or pebble. Well okay, not that small, but you get what I mean. However, I wasn't disappointed at all. In fact, I kind of loved it. It was truly amazing to see these giant faces carved out of the mountain. I mainly appreciated it as a great piece of art, but I guess it represents what America is supposed to be all about (rather than what it is).
After this we went to Crazy Horse Monument. Now this (to use an American expression) really knocked Mt Rushmore out of the park. Crazy Horse was a Native American bloke, and they are carving out of a mountain a GIANT statue of him on his horse. It's still very much a work in progress, and will take ages to complete because they refuse to have any Federal funding - it's all paid for by the public. We were lucky enough to see them blast some of the rock off. They had a 1/34th scale model there, as well as pictures to show you how it will look when it's finished - it's going to look absolutely incredible! It'll be the largest statue in the world - over 550 feet tall. To give you a sense of scale, all of Mt Rushmore could fit in the area behind the main's face.
(Below) Watch the video of them blasting the rock to create the monument. We were lucky to capture this on film, plus it gives you a good physics lesson in the difference between the speed of sound and light!
This text will be replaced
After this we drove down Needles Highway, a road that weaves in between needle shaped rocks; and then through Custer State Park where we saw a herd of wild buffalo by (and on) the road.
(Below) Spirit-tastic as we see a herd of wild buffalo whilst driving through Custer State Park.
This text will be replaced
That night we went to the evening ceremony at Mt Rushmore where they light it up. There was about 1000 people there and the ceremony began with one of the rangers asking the crowd trivia questions about the Presidents, one of which was "which President said 'it tastes so good, right to the very last drop'?" I wanted to shout out 'Bill Clinton' but I didn't think it would be very appropriate.
Then a young female ranger came out and gave a speech about how proud and deeply moved she was to be an American. She was so pretentious and up her own ass, it made me want to throw up. And just when I thought it couldn't get any worse, can you believe it, she broke into a song! I didn't know what song it was but I think it was taken from the "I Wanna Have Sex With America" songbook.
Following this was a 20 minute video about America's everlasting legacy of freedom.
The whole event was so cringe-worthy and hypocritical, but at the same time it was, frankly, hilarious. I had to contain myself from laughing quite a few times. After the video they played the national anthem. Mum had brought on holiday her new video camera, and I've been videoing everything on our trip to edit down later. When I will edit the footage of the ceremony, I'm going to replace the audio of the national anthem with the theme from 'Team America' (the slow 'bummer' version if you know the soundtrack).
(Below) Mt Rushmore Evening Ceremony re-edited to show you how it felt to be there!
This text will be replaced
Next: The Grand Circle
Previous: Fiji Time
Main Menu |
|
|
